The Year in Review: 2012

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The new Boeing 787 Dreamliner can carry about 250 passengers. This blog was viewed about 1,800 times in 2012. If it were a Dreamliner, it would take about 7 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

I was going to review the movie I watched tonight, but two things stopped me.  First, I noticed that the last post I made was about New Year’s, and it seems to still be enjoying some popularity.  Second, I nerdily keep a text file of all the movies I watch in the year.  When I watch the movie, I add it to the file, and while I’m writing my review up, I sometimes do it “offline” in the text file before bringing it into this blog.  I’ve saved quite a few quotes and notes and jokes and tidbits at the end of this file, and thought perhaps I should share them.  So, here they are:


  • (I have sexdaily!!!….I mean dyslexia….Fcuk…. )
  • Your future’s so short, it wouldn’t stand knee-high to a midget
  • “Jesus loves you.”  A nice gesture in church.  A horrific thing to hear in a Mexican prison.
  • You won’t like me when I’m angry.  Because I always back up my rage with facts and documented sources. – The Credible Hulk.
  • Why shouldn’t you step on a watch? Its a waste of time.
  • What kind of teeth can you get for a dollar?  Buck teeth.
  • What do you call two guys fighting over a prostitute? Tug of whore.
  • Why do chicken coops have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans.
  • Hear about the corduroy pillows?  They’re making headlines.
  • Have you heard the joke about the sidewalk?  It’s all over town!
  • When you were born, dirt was new.
  • I held the door for a little old lady in the shop today.   We all laughed as she banged on the window shouting, “Let me in.”
  • If you spoke your mind, you’d be speechless.
  • I just realized that my garbage cans go out more often than I do.
  • You didn’t fall out of the stupid tree, you were dragged out through dumbass forest.
  • Haikus are easy
    but sometimes they don’t make sense
  • There once was an unfinished limerick.
  • If vegetarians eat vegetables, beware of humanitarians.
  • If you are ever attacked by clowns, remember to go for the juggler.
  • You’ve got a Buddhist monk, and he’s refusing the anaesthetic for his root canal work. What’s he trying to do?  Transcend dental medication.
  • Someone get me some Potassium, Nickel and Iron….I need a KNiFe.
  • A skeleton walks into a bar, orders a beer and a mop.
  • There’s nothing like a good joke, and that was nothing like a good joke.

Witticisms and Other Thoughts

  • Think that every night might be the night, because one night, it will be.
  • Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we’re still here we may as well dance.
  • If you don’t do this by yourself, you’ll never know if you’re any good. And you’ll never be good if you don’t know that you are.
  • I’m so uncool, I melt ice.
  • Youth is a blunder; adulthood a struggle; don’t let any age be a regret.
  • The gift of talent is nothing without the talent to take that gift.
  • You look at the stars and you see infinity.  You look into a microscope and you see infinity, and right in the middle of those two extremities, perched on a balance beam, is us.  Life.
  • Do you have to leave so soon? I was just about to poison the tea.
  • Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma.
  • I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.


  • Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.  Give him a  mask and he will tell you the truth.  – Oscar Wilde.
  • The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. – Albert Einstein
  • Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. – Albert Einstein
  • A man should look for what is, and not for what he thinks should be. – Albert Einstein
  • If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough. – Albert Einstein
  • Imagination is more important than knowledge. – Albert Einstein
  • They say I don’t have nothing but a prayer, well chump, all I need is a prayer, because if that prayer reaches the right man not only will George Foreman fall, but mountains will fall. – Muhammad Ali
  • Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.  –  Dr. Seuss
  • You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. –  Dr. Seuss
  • If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good. –  Dr. Seuss
  • Why fit in when you were born to stand out? –  Dr. Seuss

Doctors Einstein and Seuss, both very wise men.  What will 2013 hold?  Who knows.  Q4 of 2012 didn’t go so well for me.  I stopped.  No more ties with cartoon characters, very little joie de vivre, and a distinct lack of magic in my life.  The twinkle in my eye faded away, and the spark was all but extinguished, but I suppose that gives me something to work on this year.  Ah well, enjoy this until next time:

Also, here is the original version.


Posted on 13-01-09, in General. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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